So I just found your Tumblr and I saw your post about never surviving zombies because you're stuck at your current weight. I immediately felt a need to comment this because I've found myself in the same boat. I've commited myself to never stopping doing something (healthy eating, smaller workouts). I like it because it reminds me that even if the scale doesn't change, I know I will be able to do a little more tomorrow than I could yesterday. Best of luck on your journey! You can do it! :D
Aw! Thanks for the encouragement! =) I was in a bit of a funk for a while - thinking that the scale had a favourite number and what not. But I have to say, once I saw your words and started to realize that I really would be able to do a ‘little more tomorrow that I could yesterday’ - it’s been much easier to deal with a scale with a favourite number. =D
I went for a bike ride for the first time since I hurt my back today. It was uhh-mazing. Definitely a workout. I only did about 6kms, but omg. Omg. Omg. It was intense. I think I may have to bike again tomorrow. If it was warm like it was today, yes. If not, it’s a jog.
I love being by myself. I can think and try to clear my mind when I’m out walking/jogging or biking. Sometimes I can’t stop thinking - especially these days. I find myself smoking more. Cigarettes and weed. I’ve even been drinking beer. Like, wtf? I bought a 12 pack a few nights ago and I have to assume there’s less than a six pack left over. Makes it take longer for me to lose weight, but I’m still going.
Trying to be healthy is tough stuff. Like, fuck… I feel way better when I’m doing the good stuff, but sometimes I don’t want to do it.
It’s worse when my parents don’t really seem to care what kind of food they eat. I need to move out and on. Sheeeesh.
i’m lost. still. i keep wondering what i’m actually supposed to do, where i should be… and i’m using my weight as an excuse to be patient. all i want right now is to be at an healthy weight and fit. so i can do what i’m meant to do. i feel like i’m living in a fantasy world. not a good fantasy. but not necessarily a nightmare.
i don’t know WHAT to think anymore. all i know is that i’m stuck at my current weight and everything i eat seems to upset my stomach in one way or another. i’ll never outlast a zombie attack. fuck sake. ha.